Enmeshment and Enmeshment Trauma Dynamics with Teal Swan.

One way for a narcissistic parent to retain their source(s) of supply is by disrupting their children’s ability to individuate and develop personally. The narcissist does not want the child(ren) to develop apart from them and will use different methods to slow and stop their advancement in relationships, personal growth and intellectual development. Enmeshment is one of those methods.

One way to identify enmeshment is to observe the emotional, physical and mental ‘tracking’ that occurs between the parties. If a child says, “I love my (parent). I practically am my parent,” this might be a symptom of the lack of personal individuation of that child. Enmeshment can result in what is known as an ‘undifferentiated ego mass.” This unfortunate condition describes the enmeshment of the psyches of two persons in an unhealthy dyad of dysfunction where the child is being used as an object by the parent for the purpose of mediating their own pathology(ies).

Teal Swan does a great job explaining this serious condition which the victim must come to understand in order for them to reject it and regain their emotional and psychological health, and to develop a healthy personality, free of nuanced coercion. It often starts with physical separation, re-establishing lost relationships and creating safe boundaries with the perpetrator.